thrifting...

My girl and the gk are masters. I can not believe what they find. Gage is still in his UnderArmour phase. I would not bet much money that one would find UA at Goodwill and I would be wrong.

So, we all go to GW on Saturday and they say, with every confidence imaginable, Nana, lets find you some UA! It went without saying that is had to be black. That is an understood given.

I must admit, I am now into UA. Having texture issues myself, when it is hot outside, cotton is my worst enemy. I cringe at the thought of putting it on and don't tolerate it at all, hence the UA feel is where I am not. Not a snob, will wear other brands that have the same feel and until yesterday, didn't own one piece of UA. That all has changed.

Gage was on the hunt. It didn't take him too long to find the first piece. It wasn't quite right so off he went to look again. It was but a couple of Moments when he found it. Right there, just waiting for us. black, UA and it fit like a glove.

He kept telling me, You have to be patient, Nana, You have to keep looking.
He went on to find a piece for Papa too. And a jersey for himself. I always, always learns so much from them - who knew it would include Goodwill!...

hunger...

It still amazes me that in this day and time, people are hungry.

This year, the little park in my subdivision put this sign out, the begining of June and the part has been full every day at 11am, waiting for lunch. It is also being done at the little park, about 2 miles away that we pass every day to get to the Rec Center.

At 11am, people are already lining up, before the food people are even there. The cars are lined up and down the street and even, down side streets. Five days a week, they know where to come to fill up and get a free meal. It is worth coming early and lining up. I have seen the lines, it is unbelievable.

Some days, it is enough to be thankful that you have a full belly. Other days, you need more, want to do more. Follow that instinct...

back and mind, still full...

Taking time off looks alot like normal life. Always have my little notebook handy, always have Something to I want to remember but the main difference is letting my mind wander. Being a left brained thinker, you would think that wandering wouldn't be my thing and that would make us, both wrong.

Creative time is not only doing but in the not doing. It need idle time. Time to do nothing, like when you are trying really hard to remember Something and it doesn't come until you have let your brain off the hook for a few minutes, then your answer comes, naturally.

Love the feeling when you have a thought and lose it before you get to paper, have done that more than once this week. To all those forgotten thoughts, Come Back, I miss you! To all those that stayed, I thank you. You are warm and fuzzy and bring such joy.

Here are some, in no particular order. May hear more about these in the days to come or they were just meant for a fleeting Moment. Regardless, they are friends, to the end.

Putting the cart before the horse
Doctor Google
Have you killed him yet?
My Rec Center friends
Crinimal Minds, no more
Moving from the driver to passenger seat
Slipping through the cracks
Get what you thought you wanted.

Time off...

Going to take a week of to think about stuff like putting the cart before the horse and other things rattling around in my brain. Blessings and love to each of you...

a dog's life...

What if we acted more like dogs?
Would that be weird?
or might it just be, a good thing?

Dogs are loyal.
Dogs know their place, by their master.
They are content, don't need to be entertained.

They will wake up in a split second.
Ready to go, wherever their owner sees fit.

They don't spend time trying to get your attention, for their master.
They follow, that is what they do.

The master leads, the dog follows...

the green quarter...

First time away from home for more than a sleepover. Church camp.

If you have never been and I have not, have only lived vicariously through my child, seems to be an oxymoron. The books that could be written about what goes on. The near misses that parents never know about. Have been to family camp and that was racy enough for me. Remember one year, when our friend lost it with the teen boys because he was in the cabin right next to theirs - He went in in his underwear and yelled a bit. His teenage daughter was mortified, some things you can't take back.

But that will never happen this week. That was 3o years ago and we are a kinder, more PC culture. I did however hear some Stories about Man Camp a few weeks ago that make we wonder...

We have our standby orders from Momma. We could be heading up to Cascade any time in the next four days. She said something about going incognito, but we would be too easy to spot even with our mustache and glasses disguise. It would never work.

The green quarter. He didn't need snacks or a new journal so got the idea to get a quarter and color it with a neon green marker. When I gave it to him, I told him it was to remind him that Papa and I were thinking of him. Praying that he would have a good time and if a little homesickness came his way, he was not alone.

He hasn't called or texted. That is either a good sign or his phone won't work. I praying that he is just too busy to miss all of us...

metformin...

I have waited for today for many, many years and I didn't even recognize it when it happened. A visit to Google confirmed it but it is still hard to believe.

I had noticed it a few times and it kept getting stronger and stronger. Until 2 weeks ago, the only pill I took was an aspirin a day. For now, that ship has sailed but am working toward the shore, every day.

I couldn't have less of an appetite. In fact, to take the diabetes meds, you have to eat or the nausea is terrible. I had to force myself tonight to eat enough to keep that side effect at bay.

I have never experienced, not being hungry. My bff, Miss Sweettooth is nowhere to be found. It is not an entirely, pleasant experience. I hope in the days to come, I am more appreciative of this new status. Feeling full all day, never ever thought I would see the day. One more reminder, anything is possible.

More and more and more change and you never know where it is coming from...

shoot...

We walk at the same time but rarely see each other. Our rhythms are different. We walk at much different paces. He evens jogs. Add basketball, and he is much more diversive than I am. I am focused on getting around that track, over and over and over again. He likes to mix it up. Different strokes for different folks.

I am so proud of him. None of this comes easy or natural and I imagine it never will but we takes turns saying, It is time to go! With each of us with our favorite music in our ears, it is a great time to catch up on our thoughts, our prayers, our hopes and our dreams. This is a part of who we are right now and the right thing to do is shoot, whenever we can...

and even, more change...

If it is your turn for your Only Child Sleepover, you get to decide and set the pace. Gage had his bags packed for more than a week and finally, we were able to make it happen.

He had already told us that he wanted to go to the Mall, so off we went. He got to spend as much time at Game Stop as he wanted and everywhere else he wanted to go. After dinner, we headed home and XBox 360 ruled the night. Listening to him explain and try to talk Papa into trying a turn at a game is a wonderful thing. The laughter of the the two, Gage as he watches Papa and Papa, when he gets it but more often, when he doesn't.

The biggest change, this time was the boy's sleeping in. We were suppose to be at his house, 40 minutes away at 9am. His eyes didn't see daylight until after 1030AM. He is within spitting distance from 10, the pre teen thing has started to kick in. I knew he would head this direction, but didn't know it was already here.

I just love that he still loves coming to our house. That he would pack his bags and leave them for a week, just waiting. Talk about Love...

something old...

We were told that in the 50's, ladies always carried hankies at a wedding. This was given to the bride by her bff's grandmother who knows a thing or two.

Looking forward to this wedding in a few weeks. Fun venue, lots of different things going on that will make it playful for all. In the spirit of the tone set by the bride and groom, my gift is non-tradional also. Even down to the wrapping, joining in the festivities has been great fun.

What advice would you give the bride?

marriage, make it your own.

What is the hardest part of marriage?

keeping your mouth shut when you should.

What will make a 50 year marriage?

Talk everyday.

Happy Wedding Miss D and N!

juggling...

We all are very busy and at any given Moment. Sometimes, we have too many things up in the air, and are trying desperately not to drop anything and winding up in a big pile, full of emotions.

Learning the ropes of this retirement thing has not been without its challenges. We are both understanding that we still need our seperate times. He is understanding that he can't eat 2000 calories a day like he did when he was working.

Our balls are all up in the air and we are trying not to let any of them, fall on our head but we need to be open to letting some of them go if they aren't right or good for us. That is the fine line we are walking, today...

obsessed...

We are all obsessed with something.

Food, exercise, people, it is part of the nature of the beast. You can't expect to avoid it but you can be aware and try to keep it as balanced as possible. You may or may not be successful but with practice, you can diffuse the situation, a bit over time.

Among my many, many obsessions, is photographing crop dusters. It all started with working in agriculture and right out my huge window, was open fields for as far as the eye could see.

Will now stop whenever I see one of those brave boys. flying. Last night on the way home from spendng the day celebrating Keaton's 13 birthday, here he was. We got to spend a good amount of time and there is no doubt, he saw me. He probably made 10 rounds. The sky was red, with all the wildfires that surround us. It was a beautiful sight and wow, the perfect way to end the day.

Some days are just like that and you know, you are the luckiest girl in the whole world...

being 13...

One of the first things I noticed about 13 is that there is no longer a stack of wrapped presents, just waiting to be opened. When the Birthday List is cash-inclusive, so go the stacks and the wrapping. It is not only the end of an era but the begining of a new one.

Still doesn't seem like we have been grandparents for 13 years. Seems like just yesterday but the hair that is growing on this young man's body, the beginnings of all things, men - is clearly obvious. Never having a brother or a son, being able to watch this season of a boy to man cycle is fascinating. Now I see, how they evolve and how they grow up into the men that you see today.

I also see why his parents keep a tight rein on him. He has manners, and is very polite. Those things don't come naturally to boys or girls, they have to be taught or they don't get learned, and if they don't learn it young, they usually never learn it at all.

Happy Birthday, Keaton! Papa and Nana could not be more proud of you. You are a Rock Star in our world and we love you, to infinity and beyond...

change...

It never gets any easier... Miss Shelli

I read Miss Shelli's words and so agreed even when I had no idea how they would apply to me in just a few days.

With a diagnosis and meds for BP and diabetes, everything changed in an instant and that was the first day of retirement. It became obvious that either I was going to get on board or be in Really Big Trouble. After consulting all the personalities, made the choice to grow up which meant big lifestyle change. Joined the Rec Center and today, on Day 4, walking over 2 miles. Have changed my diet and with a nausea from the meds, have little desire for most anything. My goal is to get off both meds by September, if that is possible and then, keep up the routine.

Time and testing will tell if this is doable but for right now, it is Something. Decided this morning to focus on what I could do and not all the things I had no control over. With no health insurance and pensions not kicking in for a few months, I have enough to worry about but I can't go there. I do have control over getting my exercise done every day and watching what I eat. That is where my focus has to be and there it will stay.

Have always hated exercise. Always done it at home, never thinking my introvert self would ever take my show on the road. We made the decision because of weather and safety. We can go together, anytime of day and enjoy the freedom of being in a climate control, safe place and that is a good thing.

Miss Shelli's words go with me every day. I know there will come a day when I couldn't get the miles done in the morning and my get up and go, got up and went. I will have to remember that somethings just don't get any easier and we do them anyway. That is what grown ups do. Time to grow up...

4th of July...

Let freedom ring and may respect never, ever go out of style...

Will you still need me?

Today is someone's 64th Bday. I ask him if he was going to sing this old Beatle song to me this morning, he didn't think he would. Said he already has been 64 in his mind for a while. He knew that 64 and retirement would be going, hand in hand so the leap was made, with little fan fare which means, no song for me.

As we started our retirement exercise program this morming, we are both trying to learn as much as possible. Him with his unsatisable, 100% curosity and me with my very little 20% sense of curosity.

We walk the greenbelt to the end and wanted to know what road we were on. Nothing looked familiar. We walked to the first street sign but it only gave the cross street. He took a few guesses but I wasn't convinced so we walked clear down to a second sign and found our bearings. This time it was me who kept us going. Curosity drove me to keep going, and figure it out while he followed. Usually, that is not the case.

The song still holds,
Will you still need me? Yes
Will you still feed me? Yes
When I'm 64...

Just, begin...

Begin with the end in mind...Stephen Covey.

The sermon began with, there comes a time in your life when you are looking back more than you are looking forward. Even though there are still memories to make, there will always be a sense of adventure, if we choose to embrace it. You could spend all your time looking back, but what kind of life would that be?

Today truly is the first day of the rest of your lives. Nothing big happening. Mowing the lawn before trash Day which always had to be done by Sunday, some major grocery shopping - trying to figure out how to replace 40 years of sandwiches, yogurt, bananas and pudding. There are adjustments to be made. Glad it is summer. Imagining trying to get yourself acclimated to retirement in the dead of winter, might be a task worthy of others stronger than us. The sun is shining, the fishing is there for the taking and right now, all is right with the world.

What kind of memories do you want to leave? Not sure he knows exactly yet, but I do. I have a 15 year headstart on him and this is mine...

Know that I cared.
Know that I loved.
Know that you are everything to me.

That is my end and that is what drives every single day...

retire...

It was a whirlwind day. Much like a blur, it was there and then it was gone.

The weekend has pretty much been a Time of Reflection. I have given him a week to learn to talk about the job in the past tense. Knowing that men are different than women, I can appreciate the time he needs to process but also know that Sometimes, we all need a kick in the pants to get us going.

Less than a 1/2 hour after we got home, all the uniforms, the lunch pail and the nasty shoes, were gone. When you have a Dirty Job like he did, there is nothing you want to save. Imagine cooking oil on every part of you, soaking in more and more, every day. The Company always complained about his shoes and tracking oil everywhere. Now they have four taking his place, wonder what it will look like now?

Tomorrow will be a new Monday. Monday will not be a dread any more. No messes to clean up from the weekend and all issues that scream for resolution, will be done by someone else. He and I, on the other hand, will be busy looking for our new Normal. Thinking that will keep us busy, enough...