Live Strong...

Today, this is my shopping list for what I can eat right now...

Instant Cream of Wheat
V8 juice
sugar-free chocolate pudding
mashed potatoes
Ritz crackers
itsy bitsy noodles
grated cheese
cottage cheese
Fiber One bars, Oats and chocolate
ice cream - anywhere

The menu varies a bit and I have had trouble with some these foods. If I am at your house and you have homemade hummus or mashed potatoes, don't be offended but I won't try them. I don't add new foods often and if I do, it is at home where my emergency stash of meds will help me get whatever, down.

It has been over 8 years ago since I have eaten what we would all consider, normal. There had been swallowing issues for a long time. but there have been moments when I tried something different and I was over the top, giddy. Most days, it doesn't even bother me. I eat and we are done. Sometimes, like now - it bothers me a bit more. A smell or a well set table make me yearn to participate.

In the Big Picture, it is a small price to pay. Looking around, I know I am a lucky girl. We all have Something in our lives that we wish we didn't. Something that nags at us and we just wish it would go away...and it doesn't. I am a firm believer that Life Is Not Fair and embrace it. Sometimes, I have to imagine eating, say a cheeseburger. It is not really the eating as much as the smells, the anticipation, the juiciest - the experience. I can't imagine the swallowing part - that ship has sailed but this exercise really helps me get through the tough times. Might have to do it several times a day. Sweet and savoy, whatever the craving. Works for me.

Dwelling on it, is not for me. Wishing it weren't so, doesn't work for me either. This is where the AA creed comes in, paraphased - Accept the things you cannot change and have the courage to change the things you can. And, God works miracles and as long as you know and live that, whatever your Today looks like - is where you are suppose to be. As the Lance Armstrong people say, Live Strong...

gift certificates...

Two years ago, I donated a photo session and digital page gift certificate to a teen auction at the church. It came in a little fun package with a 12 month time frame for collecting the session. I remember thinking at the time, it was a good thing to put a time frame on the gift certificate because I didn't want someone coming out of left field years later...

So I waited to be contacted...and waited...and waited. I had heard thought the grapevine that my contribution had been merged with a another item so I knew it had been bought but I never heard from whoever bought it...until yesterday.

All the information to contact me had been included, several time - in the package. Email, home and cell phone - every possible way there was 2 years ago to claim their photo session. Yesterday I was contacted by Facebook by the person who bought my certificate. She was not a friend but I guess you can leave someone a note on Facebook without being a friend if it is a private email. This person explained that she had bought the certificate and would be in town this week and could I take pictures for her. I told her no, that I had plans and that was not possible. I told her I wish she had contacted me 2 years ago and we could have taken care of it for her. She acknowledged that the certificate was given to a family member who is not good at following through. I responded that I understood, that we all get busy and to enjoy her Idaho time. Then the response I got back was, Too bad I spent $125. I did not respond back. We were done.

Forget that this person has had over 2 years to contact me and say - Hey, I got yur GC and wondering if we can put it off until Sometime Down The Road? I would have been more than willing to forget the time restraints but to contact me 2 years later, seemed a bit, inappropriate and it made me mad. Over and over in my mind, I tried to take my mad out and finally said, what can I live with? I realized I could live with the the deal as it done. In fact, I am very good with it.

There is a sense of entitlement in our culture. You see in in all generations, young and old. It goes something like this - the rules don't apply to me. You know what - they do if someone makes, even forces you to be accountable. We have allowed people to not take responsiblility in allowing them to continue in doing what they wamt, when they want. With me, not so much.

I am glad this is done.
I always wondered what happened and now I know.
Sometimes, we screw up and it cost us...

fire drill...

I say that with a great deal of confidence because when I got home a few hours later and checked Twitter, there was no school issue going on. While I was stopped at the light, I saw swarms of kids walking along side the building and getting into rows. I grabbed my camera and as I cruised by, snapped these guys hanging out at 1030 in the morning. I could see that these junior high kids were standing in pretty neat rows, actually, it was quite impressive. They had learned well - don't know if they knew it was a drill or the Real Thing but it looked to me, they got it right.

I haven't been a part of a fire drill since high school. One would think that there would be places in Real Life for preventive drills. There is preventive measures for everything from pregnancy to brushing your teeth but for everything else, you are pretty much on your own and we all know how being on our own usually works out.

Real Life means no more automatic fire drills. You are now not only responsible for your behavior and choices but also, fire drills and not just the kind that may save your life if you forget to blow out a candle. With Real Life, doing some drills so you know what to do when you may be called to do it...and you are ready. Maybe not just for you but maybe, to save someone else.

If you haven't thought about an escape route at your home in case of a fire, do it now. Then move out and do a drill in another part of your life. Imagine what you might do and practice it. Maybe take a CPR class, learn the Heimlich Maneuver carry aspirin in your purse ( might save someone having a heart attack) or maybe, just practice keeping your cool in the case of an emergency and doing what needs to be done.

The only place that you can't drill on is God's grace. When you need it, it will be there. Not before. Would love to stockpile prayers but it doesn't work that way. What you can drill on is knowing where to go, when it is time. When not if, there will be a Time when you will need to hit the floor with prayer - all you need to know is where to go. Drill that and you will have it made in the shade...

once upon a time...

I am reading Donald Miller's A Million Miles In A Thousand Years and I feel alot like Rob Bell does,this book is powerful and unsettling. I am only a third of the way thru but I already am having trouble sleeping. In a good way.

Stories, ours - the ones we write and the ones we live. They really have a lot in common, In fact, they are totally interchangeable. The essence of writing a Story is quite simple. To quote Jordan from AMMIATY, A story is a character who wants something and overcomes conflict to get it.

There are lots of things I must sort out...that and finish the book but there are some deep, God truths that are going to come to the surface. I can hardly wait. Why, you ask? Because I can see it leading to,and I never pass up an opportunity to live... happily ever after

bulls eye...

The human spirit is driven by the bulls eye. Even those who live in countries who have no idea about what a dart board looks like or what a bulls eye is, live it each and every day.

We each are driven to aim and hit the bulls eye, no matter who we are, where we live, what car we drive, what religion we belong to. The bulls eye has no competition in keeping up with the Joneses. Only those aiming for the same bulls eye are seen as any kind of competition and they come and go. Our bulls eye's also come and go. They can change daily, sometimes hourly and at their very worst, in an instant. Bulls eye's change with Seasons of life and circumstances we see and don't see coming.

For some of us, getting use to first grade is Bulls eye#1. It has been a hard road and needing good something to aim for. There is now a 9 day break in first grade so hoping all the work will not be undone in Day 10, hoping that dart stays in place, firmly implanted in that center circle. The best case scenario is that there will be a new bulls eye in 10 days...because make no mistake, there is always a bulls eye in our lives. It is what keeps us going and the direction or course that we choose to hit our target determines what life will look like. Whether a drug dealer or student...there is always a bulls eye, always a plan, a vision, a desire.

Pick your bulls eye purposefully, everything else will depend on it...

fall of 1979...

We are only a few days into fall and I am already feeling a new swell of life coming on. There is good news about Elijah, everyone is well and the crispness in the air can not be denied. Boise State is 2-0 and it seems that most everything is well.

A fall season doesn't go by when I don't think about the fall of 1979. It had been a tough summer and unlike 2009, there was much confusion and anxiety. A LDS Boy and a atheist Girl were trying to make their way through the Door been opened to them. There were threats. The LDS Boy told his best friend if he said Jesus loves you one more time, he would deck him and he meant it. It didn't stop his friend and there were never any punches thrown. The atheist Girl on the other hadn't, had a list of questions that she waved in front of her best friend's face, demanding answers, Answers that the friend patiently answered, one by one.

Sometime that fall, it became clear to the LDS Boy and the atheist Girl, that Jesus was who He said He was and they embarked on a now, 30 year journey. There have been ebbs and flows as there have been in Real Life but we have both come to the conclusion that either He is who He says He is...or He isn't. Pick a team. No matter what is happening on the field. No matter how many fumbles, bad calls and unfair Moments, it is what it is and you are either in or out.

I can't wait. The next few weeks I've got some photo shoots that I am so excited about. The backgrounds will be filled with red, golds and greens. Can't wait to shoot my babies for a Christmas picture, beautiful H for her senior pictures and families because really, what else is there?

I am a lucky girl.
These are great times.
Thank you Fall, you have been sorely missed...


My cell phone is dead.
It won't charge,
I am lost.

After spending over a 1/2 hour with a TMobile CS person it was his determination that I needed a new battery and did I want to order one now? He explained that that the phone had a year warranty but the battery only 90 days and since it has been 6 months, I had no other option. I opted to take it to a real life TM locations before ordering a $47 battery. After spending less than 5 minutes with David, he determined that not only did I not need one of his $29sameasthe47dollarone batteries, it wasn't a battery issue at all.

Seems the phone is defective and won't accept the charger's promise of wholeness. After he spent 10 minutes on the phone explaining to a TM CS person how he went thru the process to diagnosis that the battery was not the problem, they finally relented and decided to send me a new, refurbished phone. She also explained to me that if I didn't return the defective phone with the pre paid envelope, I would be charged $300. REALLY, there are people who do not return broken phone. Great money making idea - wish I had a business and thought of this.

She also informed me that if and when they got the phone back, they would check inside and if one of the plastic pins was broke, they would charge me $100 - did I want to buy insurance for $1.99 a month? I have drafted a letter that will be duck taped to the bad phone that says the last 4 times the charger was plugged into the phone, was done by a TM employee. There is no way I am paying the $100 - even the nice man at the TM store said there was no damage to the phone. Old/new phone should be here in 7 days, I am still lost...

When you have time, you can accomplish much. Had I have been working, this would have been long, drawn out task. Even if you work, if you leave big gaps of time to be spent however you need - it is well worth doing...or not doing. That and to hear your DH after a particular long and ugly day say as he is racing back to work, I need another hug...

the messenger...

The Gaither Vocal Band just released a new CD with some old friends. One of those friends is Micheal English who had been part of the group and then went out on his own. His music was and is still, some of my favorite. There was a out of marriage scandal and he disappeared off the christian radar for a long time. I had heard he was back and when I saw he back with GVB, it brought tears to my eyes.

There but for the grace of God go I...and you. Just like the degree of separation thing, we are all pretty darn close to doing things we never could have imagined doing. It is just more visible when you are in the public eye in any genre but for any religious figure, I think it is a tougher climb back up. Even politicians seem to be on the fast track to a quicker forgiveness level.

The major difference I see between a Micheal English and Micheal Jackson is the Message. Character and honesty are one thing in a person, the Message they bring is something else. Even though Micheal Jackson had a great message in the Man In The Mirror ,there was little resemblance of it in his life. I am rambling but what I am trying to ask is, Does it change the truth of the Message if the messenger falls?

If your preacher, pastor, friend were found today to be caught in unfavorable circumstances, does that mean that the Word they have brought is null and void? I think not although it is difficult to separate the two. God has used imperfect people since the very beginning to spread the Word. He knew that would screw up before they did yet, He prevailed and used them anyway. I have had a hard time separating the two but I think I can truthfully say now, I would not be shattered. I understand the messenger and The Message are two separate things. I hope my God eyes have grown up. I will admit, I was stunned when the whole ME thing went down and he was sincerely, sorry. He retreated and put his life back together. You don't see that much these days. We have witnessed moral issues being covered up when there should have be prosecution. The Church has brought on it sown trouble by not doing the right thing and people lose faith.

The Word is the Word, no matter the shortcomings of the messenger. We each have failed many people in many different ways. It doesn't change the Message. The Message that God loves you and Jesus died for you. It is pretty simple, even else after that is just trying to explain a few simple principals. If imperfect people were good enough for Jesus, they better be good enough for me...

taking turns...

Wheat from Pathos Media on Vimeo.

September 20th, 2009 by kksmlizzie

Sunday September 20th, 2009

Praise God everyone, Elijah has taken a turn for the better today…………He is conscious as they have lowered his sedation somewhat to begin to bring him around so he will be aware of his surroundings. He recognized Joy and smiled at her when she talked to him, he was aware of his visitors and made motions to them that he was understanding them. They have reduced the amount of work the respirator is doing to have him begin to breathe on his own with secondary assistance from the respirator.

Joy was very excited today as we talked, Elijah had some friends stop by to visit him including KKSM friends Stephen Baldwin and Jeff Loope from the east side of the U.S.
Also family and friends from Winchester have been with him today.

They have moved Eli into a private room in the ICU unit and one of our friends knows the President of the hospital and he is taking a personal interest in Elijah and his care firsthand.

The medical team has made the decision to have Elijah on dialysis 24 hours a day hoping this will help him restart the kidneys and get them functioning again.

This is good news as he was not making much progress yesterday and now with the reports coming in it is obvious that all the prayers going up for Elijah have been effective.

Keep praying for Joy and Elijah and the progress made today.

God bless


This is the latest update on Elijah. It has been a hard week and this is the first hopeful news we have received. Wheat, this short was posted by Papa D on FB. He explained that they had made it for an upcoming web site before Elijah had to live what he has been preaching. E is in a place where each of us could be, and at sometime, will be. A place we never saw coming, that we were completely unprepared for and all that we can do is be still and know that He is God.

This could be me...
This could be you...
No rhyme or reason, no heads up, no warning...

We wrestle not against flesh and blood but against principalities.
Not if but when.
Go be witnesses.

Elijah is now being a witness in a way he never imagined. The skate team is is being tested and the Word is alive and well. Hoping Elijah will be able to tell us himself soon. Praying E. Word...


We all give it and we all get it. Sometimes, it is asked for and sometimes, it is given freely. Sometimes too freely. I am guilty on all counts. We all are.

The thing about advice is whether you are giving it or getting it, you have to remember it is not truth, Advice is your opinion of anything, seen through your own personal filter. That filter takes in experiences, beliefs, likes and dislikes - and a whole lot more. We get offended when asked for our opinions and they are not followed. The thing is, the person getting the advice now has to run it through their filter and it will not resemble the advice you gave. How could it? There is not a one of us who has identical experiences. Even if we have a similar experiences, it is just one out of millions. Even with a comparable experience, the outcome will be like trying to compare apples to oranges.

In saying all that and I believe it is true, there are times that make you go... I read what I have mostly considered a reasonable-based column. Good, solid answers mostly. Good thing that we are not renewing the newspaper when our year subscription runs on in January 2010. I think Annie and her Mailbox have a screw loose...

Dear Annie,
I have been living with Alex for 2 years. We have a 9 month old daughter, Maggie. I just found out that Alex told his employer that Maggie had died. He received $300 and the company was going to hold a fundraiser to cover funeral expenses. I was furious. I called his boss and let him know that Maggie is alive and well. Alex resigned his position and returned the money.
Alex said he did it because I complained about our finances. That's a lousy excuse. I complained because I was tired of supporting all 3 of us. I pay for everything and Alex doesn't contribute a dime.
I told him this was the last straw and he needed to move out. He said once he gets his own place, he wants to see Maggie. Should I fight for sole custody and keep her from her father? Confused Mom In Omaha...

Dear Omaha,
We understand your concern that if Alex has unsupervised visits with Maggie, he might sell her. But in spite of his greed, is Alex otherwise a good father? Does he love her and care for her properly? Studies have shown that fathers who are involved with their children's lives are a major factor in the development of the child's self-confidence and how well they do in school. Unless Alex is abusive or teaches Maggie to lie, cheat and steal, a healthy relationship between them will be best for everyone.

Doesn't the threat of selling a child fall under the abusive flag? Is it just my filter or is this really, bad advice? Don't even get me started about the mother who is living a confused life. I pray that Maggie finds her way out of both of these people's lives. That is my best, filtered advice to her...


I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through Him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:12-13

I have never had a good memory. An actor, I could never be. Less than 5 words, maybe. Early on, even though I was in my late 20's - trying to make myself memorize bible verses was just not happening. Early church years it seemed if I couldn't recite Matthew, Mark, Luke and John from memory all at one time, I was doomed.

Over the years, I have trained myself to be content with knowing the Word in smaller doses. The parables are Stories to me - I can't recite them word for word, but get the main idea. When you take out the oughts, you are left with what works for you. We each learn in different ways and Jesus doesn't care which way that is. Quite honestly, I am not impressed with those who can spit out scripture like a runner on a 250 K race. It is about taking the Word and obeying it. It is about the Word becoming Real in my life. It is about being in the Moment, in the Word.

Elijah Moore, one of the great kids in the KKSM skate ministry has been literally fighting for his life this week. All day, the Word, that we wrestle not against flesh and blood but against principalities , has been going through my head. E brings the Word to the kids. He preaches the Word. This is big time, this is war. He is out on the sidelines, someone else will bring the Word...for now. We are all praying for E to be back on the front lines, bringing the Word to those who have been given to him. Word.

I guess that is why the Message is my Word of choice. No chapter, or verse. No beginning or end. The Word was made flesh and dwelt among us. Those are good words, good words indeed...

potato salad...

When the family meets this weekend to hobnob and burn burgers, the family member assigned to bring the potato salad is likely going to walk in with a couple of gallon plastic buckets of yellowish muck bought at a convenience store, the price stickers still on them, and set them down on the table with no apology whatsoever.

Or, if they have more disposable income, they'll bring paper containers full of brownish muck from the natural organic sustainable united empathetic co-op.

If you bring garbage to share with your family, the least you can do is tell a lie and say, "I couldn't make the potato salad myself because I am bipolar and my lover left me and my dog has leukemia and I have an oozing leprous sore on my mixing hand."

It is not that hard to make potato salad, people. Take half an hour away from your Facebook page and do the job right. Boil some eggs, chop the celery and chives and green onions, boil the potatoes, make your mayonnaise, maybe toss in a little sour cream, use plenty of dill, and sprinkle paprika on top. The eerie-yellow store-bought stuff in the tubs was manufactured at Amalgamated Salad in Houston by undocumented 12-year-olds from the hills of Michoacan. Worse, it is teaching our children that accomplishment doesn't matter.

A child served yellow slop from a bucket is being told that it's OK to plagiarize a term paper off the Internet just so long as it's poorly written.
Garrison Keillor, Salon,com.

Amen brother.
That yellow muck that shows up at every church picnic and family BBQ. It is time take a stand. It isn't just about potato salad anymore, the tender souls of children are at stake. It has taken me 7 years to get Gage to freely admit that homemade hamburgers are better that McDee's or Burger King.

This summer I started mashing my boiled eggs with one of those potato mashers that looks some kind of branding iron. I LOVE how it uniformly gets those eggs ready for salad or sandwiches in virtually no time at all. The whole eggs mashing process, literally took my breath away.

It is all right to cut corners but we need to be responsible about it and potato salad is nowhere to begin. Use dull shears - it will take twice the effort but as long as no one gets hurt, who doesn't have a few hours a day to spare? Imagine a generation where the yellow muck was not only gone but where fables of its existence were met with playful skepticism.

Attend to the details. Teach your children manners. Write cogent paragraphs. Drive carefully. And make a good potato salad, one with some crunch, maybe accompanied by a fried drumstick with crackly skin -- the humble potato and the stupid chicken, ennobled by diligent cooking -- and is this not the meaning of our beautiful country, to take what is common and enable it to become beautiful? All our beautiful young people -- so diligent and focused and powered by hope -- you can't tell me those kids didn't have parents who took time to chop the celery and onions and experiment with the ratio of mayo to mustard to achieve a potato salad that is worthy of our Lives, our Fortunes, and our sacred Honor. Word GK...

from the desk of...

This isn't a picture of my desk but it could be. Surrounded by those things I love, searching the world on the internet, one screen at a time. It is my favorite non- person place to be.

Reading my blogs, checking in on Twitter and FB - all I need to know it right there.

Today, I am looking for updates on Elijah Moore. He is one of the great kids on the KKSM skate team that is fighting for his life. In a come and renal failure, it isn't looking good. We are all praying for him and his wife. God is good all the time, all the time, God is good.

I will check in with my 50 or so blogs. Last night, I found Chocolate Banana No Ice Cream and it is in my freezer now. Later on, I learned that Patrick Swayze had lost his battle with cancer. He will be Dirty Dancing to me forever.

The story about that poor student killed on campus at Yale. Found stuffed in a wall in a lab on what was to be her wedding day. There will always be an ache in our hearts when we hear these Stories and we will continue to hear thsese Stories. What a thing to count on.

A quick dash on Redbox to see what's new and checked out a few digi sites. Miss Holliewood has a new kit out and on sale. Guess you can figure out how that ended.

I have had this desk for over 15 years. It is 78 inches long and has two drawers. It has ruined me for any other computer desk. Wide and spread out, enough room for what I need and what I need that I don't know about yet. My Sally Jean necklace collection sits on a black statue right next to my 1 1/2 terabyte external HD. It is a beautiful thing.

The phone just rang. My sister fell at work and crushed her right hand. Her husband is out of town and she needs her dishes done today and a ride to the surgeon tomorrow. Looks like it is time for Real Life. Have a great day...


My perception is somewhere along the line, our culture has turned a sentiment into a lifestyle. It is easier to ask for forgiveness than permission. The truth is, it is not very attractive and certainly, doesn't add to the human credibility issue which already suffers enough.

There will always be those who are sorry after being caught. I truly believe they are sorry. I honestly believe they are sorry, they were caught. We see this all the time after a public outing of someone caught in a marital indiscretion. Boy, are they ever sorry but somehow in this new lifestyle of ApologyGate, it has become almost the new normal.

Growing up, that would get me slapped across the face. You knew if you had to say you were sorry, you truly were. It meant you had made a very bad choice and there would not be a second offense. Would not happen. Period.

In the last few days alone, we have multiple I'M Sorry issues. Republican Joe Wilson who yelled, You Lied during the President's speech last week. Can you really represent your district/people when you can't control your verbal actions? To me, I'm sorry doesn't cut it.

Kanye West jumped on the stage at the MTV awards during Taylor Swift's acceptance speech to praise Beyonce's video. He later offered an apology. Big Deal. He is just living the Lifestyle.

Not to leave out the ladies, Serena Williams threatened to shove a tennis ball down a line judges throat at the US Open. She has been charged a $10,500 fine but so far, no apology that I can verify. Apparently a financial, forced I'M Sorry is a certified substitute for a verbal one.

If this is the new normal, I am officially rebelling. If we allow people to say, do whatever they want and only give lip service or a certified check in response, I'd say with much confidence - we're in big Trouble...


There are many doors to knowing someone. There is the biblical one - where knowing is about being the most vulnerable you can be with a human in a physical way. A skeptic might say you can have sex with someone and not know a thing about them. That's is true and it is also true that something done out of context, changes the rules.

There is another kind of know that can only come from free-falling conversation. Whether at a coffee shop, or in a beauty shop or even around a firepit as was my experience last night. Spent 4 1/2 hours around said campfire with three fabulous women. Mother, daughter and daughter's friend. Basically 2 generations discussing everything from men to Jesus to politics. Where they are and where we have been. To see the world thru their eyes was a wonderful gift they shared freely. Sarcasm and cynicism ebbed and flowed just like the fire and when I rolled into my garage after 130AM, I felt the familiar joy of being filled up.

This morning, had to run to Walmart to grab supplies for DH lunch this week. I got the cashier that I have had many times before. I commented that the store seemed empty and we got into the church conversation. She offered that her mother had raised her in the LDS church but that now she was a wiccan and her husband was a satanist. I perceived that she was looking for a negative reaction, almost like she would be disappointed if it didn't happen. I gave her nothing. Nothing will change the next time I see her. I will not go out of my way to avoid her. The only thing that will change is now that I know her, she will come to mind and when she does, I will ask Jesus to throw everything I can think her. Not because she is bad but because she need Jesus.

One of the things we talked about last night/morning was the possibility that the only thing Jesus asked us to do, the total essence of the gospel is to completely be/listen focus/ on who we are with at any given time.

Could it be that easy?
If that was the only thing asked of us, could we do that?
I don't know but it is worth a try.

I pondered teaching some sort of spiritual class but after some godly debate, decided against it. Wanting to invest myself somewhere. Maybe that investment looks differently that I imagined. I am going to make a conscious effort to find out. I don't think it will be easy or something that will come naturally but if it could direct me to the know, I'm in...

his corner of the world...

Monday, I was privileged to spend some time in Gage's little automobile corner of the world. The third seat is his domain while Morgan and Keaton sit in the middle bucket seats of the van. He was excited about me sitting in back with him and shared his space quite generously. Of course, he has his side and by the picture, you can see he has marked/decorated it with the things that are important to him, Jesus and Cabela's - not necessarily in that order.

He is way ahead of his seven years. He is nothing like the other two. Last Saturday, not able to wait to learn to read sometime in first grade, he spent two hours Saturday afternoon and learned how to read Dr Seuss's, The Cat In The Hat. In less than 2 hours. I know he can read it because while in his little corner of the world, he read the whole book to me, needing very little help. How do you teach yourself to read in 2 hours? Is it strictly desire, which he has in abundance when it comes to reading? It makes me wonder what I could learn in a few hours or even a whole day if I sat down and put my mind to it.

I think the answer is in this fabulous little mobile he has made. You take what is important and keep in uppermost in your mind. Go ahead and live your life but take the essentials with you. Don't wait for Something You Want to come to you, go seek it out. Just start and see what you can learn. You start with baby steps and build on it. Don't worry about the marathon, just learn to walk.

I always learn from Gage, the house that persistence built. He is a pretty no nonsense guy. He looked me staight in the eye as we got in the van and said, I would rather read than play.. That is a some kind of wonderful way to live. Focused, yet tender. Mentally agile, but whose greatest strength is one of his favorite sayings, Good Point.

I wish I were more like him.
Wonder if it is too late?
Imagine the person I could be if I could see the world thru his eyes,
and put it to good use.
Think I will start with,
The Cat In The Hat....


A few new blogs that are making me think and grow. The first one is a blog about marketing and business. What does this have to do with me? Seth's blog is about so much more. Most of his stuff is about Real Life or at least that is what I see. Have picked up some great ideas and principals. Just like Square One.

Square one is underrated
Perhaps the worst outcome most people can imagine when a project stutters is having to go, "all the way back to square one."

Apparently, square one is an unhappy place, and far away, too.

Hey, if you're lost, if you've gone down the wrong road, it doesn't make sense to speed up and keep racing down the wrong road. Instead, the smart thing is to go back to the last spot you were in where you had a chance to find the right road and start from there.

Square one: nicer than people expect. is a wonderful journey into the medical world as seen from a young woman's perspective. This Program is brought to you by Metlife is one example.

Not being an intern anymore sure does have its perks. And it's downfalls too, but mostly perks. And in a (somewhat planned) change of events that I would love to discuss with your over coffee sometime, I took a slight detour in my residency training. Yes, I am still doing Pediatrics, but I am considering focusing on children who have chronic illnesses and special needs. And because of that, I am now working with adults. ADULTS! Plug your ears and your nose and close your eyes, there are ADULTS in the room! AAAAAAAAH. It's just for a few months, so I think I can survive. But eek gads this is a whole new world. Well, sort of. Currently I am working with adults who have had severe brain injuries. So they are sort of like kids. And then, not so much.

I had an older guy who came into the hospital with a blood alcohol level of 0.4 (=dead), and a head and neck injury from accidentally ramming his ATV into the side of his double-wide. Classy. After a long while, when he was well enough to stand, I asked him to walk in a straight line, as best as he could.

With his ruddy cheeks sticking up over his cervical collar and mashing into his eyelids, he scoffed at me. "Damn, girl. I couldn't even do that before I was a drunk!"

The last one may not technically be a blog but a great site to bookmark. Tasty Kitchen is the brainchild of Pioneer Woman and a fab resource for great recipes. Here is my favorite version of Chocolate Eclair Cake yet.

2 box(es) Vanilla Instant Pudding (3 3/4)
¾ cups Powdered Sugar
2 cups Milk
1 container Cool Whip (Large 12 Oz Tub)
1 box(es) Graham Crackers (NOT Crumbs)
1 can Chocolate Icing In A Can (Dark Is Best)
Preparation Instructions
You will need a 9×13 pan.

Mix pudding with milk and powdered sugar (1 cup or less).
Fold in cool whip.
Completely line 9×13 pan bottom with graham crackers.
Then layer half of the cream mixture, another layer of graham crackers, and another layer of cream (the rest of it).
Top with a layer of graham crackers and spread the top with icing (it’s best to warm the icing first and pour it over).

Keep in refrigerator (if there is any left).

A good blog, it just doesn't get any better than that...

PS...maybe it does. is a fine little site to add a most anything to a photo or layout. The Museum matte under frames is free and fAB. You can also upgrade and buy the whole site for a year for a great price. Guess it just got a little bit better...


Did I tell you about the dog and the invisible fence? We were leaving a yard sale and this huge dog in a huge yard, was barking furiously at us as we left a good 100 yards from his property. He was running sideways and it took a while for me to figure out why. He could have leaped that line and have got us...but he couldn't. He had learn his lesson and wasn't about to test the waters again. If he only knew. We live our lives alot like that dog. Call it comfort zone or whatever, we each learn where that invisible fence is...and we go no further. Never. After a while, it becomes automatic and we don't even think about the possibilities that exist outside that fence. Believe me, I am preaching to the choir here, but I am learning. I see it in little ways. Things that come over that fence, and I start to ponder, even consider. Ideas, journeys and possibilities. Those things I never, ever would have thought possible. I don't know why now except I see in myself the willingness to consider many more possibilities than ever before.

We had a great holiday weekend. Played some, got a call yesterday morning from some old friends and met them for breakfast as they rolled thru town. A quick trip up to Cougar Mountain Lodge for lunch only for find the boss gave them the day off. Had a nice little meal at Banks and a great time in the car.

I'm going to Cougar Mountain Lodge and I am going taking my
basket of berries
gage and, you get the picture.

We saw happy guy Sunday after lunch - he certainly wasn't being stopped by anything invisible or visable. Grooving to whatever he was listening too, made the rest of get a visual of that could possibly come from thinking a bit differently. Taking the plunge, thinking outside the box or just letting go for a few minutes.

I continue to have that image/icon of that dog running and barking. There is invisible all around us. What we can't see doesn't mean isn't there. Doesn't mean it isn't affecting us. Doesn't mean we should not look for it. Not sure I would have been able to say that but I am learning, I am learning...

dwell in possiblilty...

For the most part, when we think big and it is human driven - you better watch out. there are a few rare exceptions. Gage is one of them. It was one of our many trips to the dollar store, probably almost a year ago. They each got to pick out something and Gage picked out a rubber toilet plunger. We tried to talk him out of it but he wasn't having any of it. He has used it every which way...except as a toilet plunger. I have seen material tied around it and positioned in places, quite unexpected. Other than him and maybe a rare few others - dwell in possibility should be left up to Someone Else. Why? I will tell you why.

Adam and Eve...We're told that Adam and Eve chose to go their own way, to explore outside of the boundaries given to them by their maker and as a result, their relationship suffers. This story is immediately followed by the story of their son Cain killing their other son, Abel. Thsi is a rapid, dramatic progression from Adam and Eve to their sons. We've have gone from eating fruit to murder in one generation. Things are falling apart very quickly... Rob Bell, Jesus Wants To Save Christians.

See what I mean? We were in deep stuff almost out of the gate. When we start to desire to dwell in possibility, we need to go to where the action is. Where there truly is the hope, that it is so. Jesus told us to go out and be witnesses. What would the correct response be for a witness? To me, it would be what do you know and when did you know it. An explanation of first hand knowledge - not something over heard or had explained to you but having actual experience with. If there is any value in human DIP, it would only be in their witness, their lived out experience. They may help you understand and direct you toward the Possibility Dweller but only He is worthy. I think I understand more everyday that no matter what, anything is possible and that my friends, is my witness to you. Going from a girl who had no trust to one who has much now. Not because I think all will be good and happy and safe but because when it isn't, as it will be at times for each of us, I know where to go for comfort and Love. That is where I dwell, where I live and where I place my hope...


Had a conversation the other day about being over protective with children.
I am.
I will readily admit it.
Don't see it changing soon.

I might argue that we live in a different age and it really isn't over protection anymore, it is now, the new normal. We all wish we could live our front doors open and let in the cool breezes but without a deadbolt on the door, it is just not the safe thing to do. It is not 1960's anymore and if the good guys won't wear capes, it is pretty difficult to tell who is who anymore.

We get it with car seats and bike helmets. Never wore a helmet in my life. There is one hanging in the garage but mainly for show. When we bought bikes last year, DD said, Don't forget to buy helmets - got to set a good example for the kids! Now you see the kids automatically grab their helmets before bikes, scooters or skateboards. It is the new normal.

My new granddog got neutered today. The kids wanted to know what kind of surgery Banjo was going to have. After explaining that it was so he couldn't have any more puppies, they announced, but boys don't have babies. How glad am I that my expertise on where puppies come from, wasn't called upon. Protection comes in all sizes and colors.

And what is the deal with car seats? Dont get me wrong, I am all for them but why is it against the law not to have them on in the car but ok on the school bus. Is it really about the money and if it isn't, why is it safer not to have them?

I suppose if I was honest with myself, I would have them wear body armor along with that helmet everywhere they go. I want to protect them from every dangerous thing I can think of and more importantly, the ones I haven't thought of. I would throw myself in front of a bus to save them and rip into anyone who tried to take them. Bullies, bad teachers or mean kids on the playground - but I also want them to be able to take care of themselves. I want them to do some swing and standing up of their own. It is a fine line to balance both worlds and I will probably never master the balance. Will always be a bit lopsided but I think I can live with that and I just hope that, it will be enough...