It seems to grow more difficult each year. It took me a long time to admit it. I tried for years to find a common ground, a pathway that we could all walk together, but I can't, My left-brained mind wants it to all be meshed together. It will just never be...
Saturday night, Brandi, Keaton and I went to see a local production of How The Grinch Stole Christmas. It was a wonderful parody of this beloved classic and with local references and even, recognisable TV commercial jingles. It was yet another great start to this holiday season. Gage didn't want to come - he didn't realize that there was no popcorn or coke (but there was a refreshment time)and he considered people dressing up in costumes to not to be worthy of his time. He opted for McDonalds with his sister and dad. We each seemed to be happy with our choices for the evening.
As I was making lunch this morning, the all Christmas music radio station was playing Handel's Messiah without the vocals - just the music. I took this opportunity to stop cooking and sing. I got to sing all the parts I have ever wanted to and the more I sang, the more I soared - on the inside.
King of Kings and Lord of Lords...
And then the end. What a couple of minutes can do for a thirsty soul.
I don't know how to mix the Christmas of Santa and the Grinch with the Christmas of The birth of Jesus together or how to toggle between the two. Can I live in both worlds for 5 weeks every year? I see Christmas in the eyes of everyone I pass - the kids see one thing, the Big people, another. It makes most people try to be a little nicer, a bit more generous and more tolerant. Which camp they belong to - no one knows.
There is Something magical about Christmas - despite everything, Christmas was the most wonderful time of the year when I was a kid and there wasn't a baby Jesus in sight. The lights, the smells, the music and the food - it was all about the Christmas of Santa and to this day, I don't feel like I missed a thing. Mayb ethat is what scares me - I know the joy of Christmas can come off completely without Jesus.
I don't have a list of ?'s to ask Jesus someday. I don't think I will care about the things that concern me now so I know this is just a temporary issue. If He does happen to bring it up - we will go there but not wasting time on it now.
I love it all. both camps of Christmas. I do the best I can everyday despite what the calendar says and that is about all I can do. Imagine if I am suppose to enjoy it all? What a waste all this worry would be - maybe I should start now...
