if loving you is wrong, I don't want to be right...

There are two reasons to look so forward to going to the pumpkin patch - taking pictures of my wonderful family in a beautiful fall setting... and these mini donuts. It was Day 4 of my sugar purge and I honestly totally forgot. I had several of these babies in my mouth when my girl asked me what's up. Like to say I didn't partake of anymore but that would not be the honest truth. Would make for a great Story, one of being brave and honorable. Again, not in the cards.

Almost made the same mistake the following morning, Day 5. Miss M asked me what kind of muffin I wanted - chocolate or poppy seed? Did she even have to ask? I will take chocolate even when that is not one of the choices. Dip in in chocolate chips and get back to me. Not remembering is not as much as sign of senility as it is lack of commitment to said purge.

As I saw thinking about this this morning, all the diets I have been on. Most of them, very successful. Diets are not the problem. You could lose weight eating only Subway sandwiches, like Jared did. I am convinced that 95% of all diets work just like 95% of all people who lose weight, regain it back. The sense of accomplishment is coming from the wrong place and that is why we fail.

So this is what I am thinking now. Day 6. Giving up the 21 day get Sugar out of my body diet. Giving it up today. If I want it, I am going to eat it. If I want a frozen yogurt when I make my Costco run, so be it. I am not on a diet, never will be again. deal with it.

I am saying it here and now, I will never diet again and here is why. If I am interested in being healthy, then I won't eat that yogurt. If I am interested in being with my kids and grandkids, I will watch what I eat. When I get the losing weight thing out of my head and eat differently not for weight loss, or fitting into insertSIZEhere jeans but because I want to hang out a big longer, when my motivation changes, then and only then, will I be successful on an ongoing basis.

This is not going to be an easy thing to do. To change my perception. With each bite, I have to ask why. I have to be honest with myself and tell the truth. From this day forward, I am choosing to take each bite for the health of it. If I choose to stuff M&M's in my face, I am choosing to climb off the wagon for reasons less honorable than a jean size.

There must be a Reason why my 60th birthday is on Black Friday. Quite honestly, one would hope that by this age, most demons would be under some kind of control. I can tell you, that is not the case. They are here forever. How you deal with them is up to you. I don't know how well this new thought process is going to work but I am going to see if I am barking up the right tree. Always the student...