The boys had testing Friday night at karate - they were going for their brown belts and I am happy to say, they were successful. Not that there was a doubt for Gage, as long as they know most their form, they are moving on. When you get to Juniors where Keaton is, the stakes are higher. You only have three chances to break the boards and if you don't - no belt. In front of their parents and everyone else's parents that is tough, One of the guys was trying to control his tears as he hid his face in his dad's leg. They are getting a taste of Real Life and it is hard for them to doand for each of us parents.
I always look forward to Mr S's little gems of wisdom that he shares at these events. On this night he shared The Order. This is how he teaches and he says is good for everything in our lives. We all have expectations and he says when our expectations are too high, everyone gets hurt.
The Order
Memory
Focus
Proper Execution
Balance
Speed
Power
Rhythm
Automatic Reflex
He explained that we need to work thru each process until it is mastered. It takes time, sometimes, lots of time - to get thru even the first step - memory. Sometimes there is the expectation from parents and insturctors alike that after 1, 2 ,3 or some other self imposed time that a kid should being able to be at the last step - the automatic reflex.
It doesn't work that way.
We don't work that way.
Jumping ahead before finishing a step doesn't work either.
I instantly thought of the Church. People need to know Jesus before we start plugging them in positions that we need filled. They need to know beyond a shadow of a doubt, that He loves them. It has to be firmly planted in their memory that He is who He says He is and that they believe. So many of our problems are because we are trying to push people through The Order to get them to the Automatic Reflex and then we can't figure out why 20% of the congregation does 80% of the work. There is no set timeline for moving thru The Order. Everyone is different and works in their own time, in their own way. Our job, just as in karate, is to encourage them and when they have done the work, it will be evident and then, they can move on. Doesn't it make sense that you can focus on something you can't remember. You certainly couldn't expect proper execution and as for power, speed and rhythm - no way and yet, we expect automatic reflex a month after they walk through the church doors.
Mr S may be on to Something. I plan to follow The Order for a few things I am working on in my own life.. Imagine not beating yourself up because you understand where you are. Our own expectations can be worse than others but the combination of the two can be deadly. How would it feel when you start something new that you understood you would be starting at the beginning and that it was ok. In fact, that is the way it should be.... BTW, every once in a while Mr S picks a student who is not the best or shiniest but the one who has worked hard to get where they are. He takes a dollar bill, has all the instructors sign it and bring up the student in front of the class to honor him. Keaton has been in karate a little over a year. He has worked hard and you can see his memory developing and getting stronger. He got the dollar bill Friday night. He came into to karate and fought to remember every move. There were times he needed extra help. Now, you can see it in his moves, he is confident because he knows what he is doing. We could not have been more proud - except this is the second time he has won it. He won it the first time back in April. How is that for encouragement? He is in end of the memory stage and is transitioning to the focus stage. He now has a solid foundation to move ahead. He feels the Love and knows it by heart. Really, what else is there?
