There was a message on our answering machine when we can home on the 4th for a short break in the holiday action from DH's cousin. He needed to talk to us while he was in town, needing to catch us up with his dad, DH's uncle.
Uncle Elbert is the oldest of the three kids. With DH's dad passing away last year that leaves him and a sister left. His 2nd wife is dying from stomach cancer, Hospice is on board so it is just a matter of time. Besides trying to care for her and for him, they have to be start making plans for what will happen to him when she passes - at 91, he may not be able to take care of himself and decisions may have to be make quickly.
What a difficult time of life. His first wife died of cancer and he knows what is coming and his wife has had cancer and also knows, her fate. Someone must be there 24/7 now for her and then for him. If you know anything about Hospice, you know that will predict nothing. They know the process of death obviously and can help explain the physical process of the human body shutting down but as to when, where and how long - they offer very little. We talked about how she is now in the sleeping stage. She says she is happier sleeping - no pain and it just feels good. Having volunteered with Hospice, I have seen a this scenerio several times and the patients all agree. She could live a few weeks or a few months. It is a waiting game for everyone. Talking about the Veteran's Home as his next step but with a 8 to 10 month waiting list, his physical and mental health may or may not make that possible.
For now, it is a waiting game and everyone feels helpless. There is no predicting of anything. Much like those of us who have no known future looming over us. Every day is a gift, filled with the unknown and completely unprddictable. We should live our lives a bit more on the wild side. Take more chances, go on a few more wild rides and get out of the predicting business, that is for the One who made us. Live Big today, however that may look to you. I hope to do the same...
